If I am honest with you, this new year of women’s discipleship has been challenging to me in all aspects: physically, emotionally, and spiritually. In January, we celebrated meeting for a year. And while I didn’t verbalize my expectation, deep-down I was anticipating way more spiritual growth and eagerness to be transformed by Jesus than had actually happened.  After a couple meetings in the new year, I was discouraged and frustrated.

But after a lot of prayer, I came to two realizations when it comes to the women’s discipleship. One, it’s not my place to judge these women’s hearts or push the women to be more “transformed” in the way they live and choose to follow Jesus.  Two, God gives me grace every single day. I don’t deserve it. I don’t deserve His forgiveness or His love. But He gives it to me anyway. I make mistakes. I disobey. I’m stubborn and selfish. I sin. So do these women. So I should extend grace and let God do the rest.

After confessing my hard heart to the ladies, we had a challenging day of truth. We had some serious and hard conversations. I could feel the tension between our earthly desires and God’s way for us. It was so strong that I could feel the battle of flesh and spirit. But we walked away with hope. Not because we deserved it, but because in Christ, there is LIFE. After our time here on earth, no matter the hardships, we have hope in eternal life. “For this world is not our permanent home; we are looking forward to a home yet to come.” (Hebrews 13:14 NLT)

So please be praying for the ladies in the women’s discipleship group that I’m leading. Please be praying for Mary, my co-leader, who is also learning so much and being transformed. And please pray for my heart to be open and loving as I continue to lead these women to truly live for Jesus.